Just Trippin’

get out of bed: trip on my rug

walk in the kitchen: trip on the cat

go to the car: trip over feet

walk in a door: trip on a seem

talk to a man: trip on my tongue

try carrying bags: trip on a root

need to stop trippin’: gonna start screaming!

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Poem: What lies we wish were truth

Every day I wish upon a lie to be a truth, yet in this way I know, as from the start, I’ll never be with you.

Empty promised words upon trembling lips in heat will never measure up to empty cold limbs beneath the bedding and the sheets.

Alone and cold will be my life as long as truth are lies, because all these empty Promise’s make me want to cry…



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a super-kala-fradga-listic-“clutza”-ala-docious

i really am a clutz
i can’t deny the fact
that wherever I may go
there is no turning back.
in a padded room
swaddled in bubble wrap
i trip on my big toe
and the nose goes ker-splat
there is no cure
for true clutzity ones like i
i keep falling and falling
and trip my way up into the sky
i never knew living this way
could be such a pain
would you take it for free?
this bad trip from me?
trip-fall-ia is excellent this time of year
i’ll pay you triple to come, my dear
oh, for the love of…
not another knee!
didn’t I dislocate one just last week?
it’s time for this to stop do note
all complete and udder nonsensical ways – just go
for, i really am a clutz till the end of days.


unloved love

Lead, gouges crude lines

among seaweed, coral and sand.

Keeping beauties swaying

in never ending twilight,

time stopped.

Dancing clowns

play swimming among soaked

gowns of pastel flowers.

While dappled lights play a child’s

game among silk tresses.

A garden unseen

but a few times a season

shows hands of tender

crude lines of love etched on fragile skin.

Carefully cultivated, handpicked

scarlet blood red Buds are planted.

Left to the care of

Lulling waves of peace

To continue

blooming forever

more each unique,

unyielding everlasting bells.

Mind: shut the F$@K up!

my brain will not stop spinning,
it swirls around day and night,
strongly wishing and a hoping
just doesn’t seem to be working right
because of that damn thing, my mind…
won’t shut the “F” up!

Why can’t I turn the lights out up there?
just stop yelling at the next class already.
School will re-start in the morning
so, damn it, shut the “F” up already!!

I can’t even think in class, driving at dinner
Work might as well be in the past.
I’ve tried everything I can think of…
oh but wait, how can that be
when only one percent is open to me?
Open? you ask? YES!
my daydreaming mind only left me a dime.
Shut the “F”ront door right now!!! I need time.

So, brain, eyes, ears, hands and feet, mouth, nose, tummy and toes all agree:
Shut the F*@K up!!!!

let. us. sleep.



just a reminder, fetured photographs are copyright of rambling of a brown.haired clutz

gaining back trust

i failed my sister when she was young,

made the worst impression for marriage,  life, more

to one, I loved so much.

nearing 36 I feel like 16, with no knowledge of who I am,

this mind of mine fails me every time.

gaining back trust, not only from her but everyone I lost,

this shall be my goal:

get better; rise above the darkness; stay out of bed; get out of my head…

I will gain back my own trust to find myself again.

little big lies…

Little big lies, what others need not know,

That hides behind a mask, so prime with rose-colored glass.

Shove down, deep, deep, deep into the pits of the dryest desert well,

Never shed, always dread the tears that you may as well weep, do tell.

Little big lies, what others never can know,

You hear their cries, yet can never reach out even on tippy-toe ice.

Hide the fear from others’ view, make them see a healthy you,

Let their eyes know nothing but joy, and never seek the latter side to a toy.

Little big lies, what others can not understand,

The Visions you see outside of man.

In light, in dark, in sleep, in wake,

They come to me and make me shake.

So, now you see, I only lie to stay outside,

For if you knew the truth I’d be locked up to die, still telling…

little big lies

Her tears fall down from heaven in streams,

my shame eats at my soul.

Please, oh please, forgive this daughter of yours,

mother, while I try working hard for a new day.

Hear my cries and end the streams,

of this never-ending sorrow.

I promise to wake up soon, one day,

never spilling red waves on the tiles of the morrow.


My sister was born when I was 15, now she thinks I’m the one who’s 15 and she’s 35, sigh

Sisters never have an age, we’re forever-by-blood-heart-and-birth and linked, ageless

See my dears, sisters are like fine wine, and we wine well too – “she took my wifi!”

My little sister just today said, so politely, that I get on her nerves picking out tea!

Me! With picking out a tea driving her up the wall?

Well, it is fair, she sent me coo coo by two.

But I digress, She’s my sister and in my heart and art, she shall never age.

– five forever chica!

Alone within a crowd of 30

In halls and lines with masses mixed and twined, I am alone.

In the theater, with crowds growing and filling to the max, I am alone.

In the school and at the museum with excitement in the air, I. Am. Alone.

Alone in my home with six others near…

Alone in my car with two people here…

Alone in my head with thoughts drowning dear…

Breath, please let me be, ALONE.

I can’t take the cacophony in my head, in my bed.

Take an ax to it all, make it end instead.

Make it all end! alone.

sigh –

Just because I am in a crowd of 30, does not mean I don’t feel that I. am. alone.


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